Last week I spent two full days in a meeting with a group of people. If you’re anything like me, you’ll understand how tough that is.
I’ve spent the days watching what others are eating. The snacks and treats people consume when they are stuck in a room for days. I’ve spent the day handing over to my HP my food places, asking for relief from obsession.
I’ve thought a number of times I could ‘get away’ with eating just that little thing extra; trying to convince myself I’m like normal eaters.
Thankfully I was looked after. I’ve remembered that my best thoughts aren’t necessarily the best idea for me nor my HPs will for me. I’ve been able to ignore the thoughts and not act on them. There was a little extra eaten at lunch but it was generally ok.
Food doesn’t make things ok. Food won’t make me feel closer to others. Food won’t give me a boost of energy or a feeling of comfort when I am feeling discomfort. Food doesn’t help me to think clearer, be more decisive or confident in my decisions. In fact, overeating makes all those things impossible.
I am trying to learn to take life on life terms; to embrace my individuality, to accept my powerless over food as well as my powerlessness over people, places and things including my inbox.